Unanxious and unintimidated.

These two words don’t necessarily describe me. I’d like them to. I’m working on it. I’m just not quite there yet.

I’ve spent far too much time feeling anxious. I hate even admitting that, but it’s the truth. My heart starts racing, sometimes my palms get a little sweaty. Thoughts start swirling around in my head and at times I begin to actually feel physically sick. A knot begins to form in my stomach. The skin around my neck and shoulder area gets all red and blotchy. Ugh. Just writing about it is making me feel anxious!

I’ve discovered over the years that Fear and Anxiousness seem to go hand in hand. They are like best friends that don’t part ways easily. Oh that Fear, she’s a tricky one. She seems to attract so many “friends.” She kind of reminds me of the mean girl in high school that stalked the halls with her posse (anxiousness & intimidation) lurking close behind. And you just knew if “she” (FEAR) wasn’t there that her group would fall apart because she was the glue that kept them all together.

I was working on something for our upcoming ladies’ conference at our church and was looking up scriptures about beauty. 1 Peter 3:3-5 has such great insight.

“What matters is not your outer appearance-the styling of your hair, the jewelry you wear, the cut of your clothes-but your inner disposition. Cultivate inner beauty, the gentle gracious kind that God delights in.”

This is such a great verse!  Probably one you’ve heard before too. But there’s more. I kept reading and it says this,

“The holy women of old were beautiful before God that way, and were good, loyal wives to their husbands. Sarah, for instance, taking care of Abraham, would adress him as “my dear husband.”

This brings a smile to my face because I can’t help but envision Aaron (my husband) sitting in a cushy chair as I stand tall and proper next to him, waiting to serve him with an “As you wish, my dear husband” response. (Insert fanning and feeding of grapes here.) Perhaps this would be as good a time as any to let you know that for several weeks during the height of our obsession with Downton Abbey we would refer to each other as “milady” and “milord.” “I’m heading to bed honey, you coming?” “Yes, milord.”

It says that the holy women of old were beautiful before God that way. In what way? They were good, loyal wives. I want to be beautiful before God in that same way. Now obviously this doesn’t mean we have to address our husbands with “yes, my dear husband” all the time. Let’s face it. Some of us could just stand to work on not yelling out a list of needs the minute he walks in the door. So, addressing him with “yes, my dear husband” may cause him to fall over with a heart attack. But what it does mean is that we can show our “beauty” simply by being good and loyal wives. Maybe we could stand to work on greeting our husband with a hug and kiss when he walks through the door. Maybe we need to get a reign on our tongue and just refrain from complaining and criticizing. God says that’s what’s beautiful! I was reading part of a blessing prayer for women by John Piper and his prayer was this, “That, if you are married, you creatively and intelligently and sincerely support and respect your husband as deeply as obedience to Christ will allow…that you influence him spiritually primarily through your fearless tranquility and holiness and prayer.”

If we want to have a spiritual influence through our fearless tranquility then we have to say goodbye to fear. Goodbye to anxiousness, to intimidation. Verse 6 says this,

“You’ll be true daughters of Sarah if you do the same, unanxious and unintimidated.”

As we cultivate our inner beauty, the gentle gracious kind that God delights in, the anxiousness and intimidation that threatens to weigh us down, will gently slip off of us. As we cultivate our inner beauty we will be gifted with the courage & confidence that comes in knowing to whom we belong.

Father I pray that today you would show us how to creatively, intelligently and sincerely support and respect our spouses. That you would cause us to be the true daughters of Sarah that you have called us to be…unanxious….unintimidated…FEARLESS!